Clipping the politicos down to size

I’ve had a business here for five years, but I’m from the Midlands originally, and I lived in London for ten years before moving here to open the salon. After being in London I didn’t want to go to a tiny little village. So a small town like this is quite nice. They say that Worcester has come up a lot in the last ten years. There’s nice designer shops, a cinema complex, a Jaguar place. It’s starting to get a little bit trendier, especially with the clothes people are wearing.

The clients that I do are probably quite wealthy – there’s a lot of horsey people. I was talking to a friend in London from the posh end, up in Knightsbridge, and he says, “What are they like in Worcester then? Are they quite scruffy?” They don’t have a clue what it’s like out of London. I go up to London about every six weeks to see friends, do some haircuts. I’m quite citified, and a lot of my clients are quite wealthy. They go off to universities and private schools all up and down the country, and a lot of them have places in London as well.

It’s a good place to bring up children here, better than in the South. I’ll stay here a while longer. You get used to the standard of living. I’m quite happy. I’ve got my garden. I can drive my car and not be so bogged down with traffic – though it’s getting worse. In fact, it’s getting terrible. It can take ages to get about here sometimes, especially when it’s flooding. I’ve got a bike but I don’t use it much. I’m always using my car.

I keep to myself. I’m quite a negative person. But as long as everything’s right as far as my child and my house are concerned, them I’m OK. If I’m going out it’ll be with friends, going drinking. But my son’s quite young so I don’t go out much. And I don’t do any amateur dramatics, or go to the gym, or vote.

Political choice?

I feel that I don’t know enough about politics. My father and my stepfather are quite into it but they’ve always been Tory, though with the last lot, they began to have grave doubts. My ex-partner is very much a liberal and was really happy when Tony Blair got in. But it just leaves me totally confused. I didn’t vote last time. I don’t think I was on the electoral register.

I probably won’t vote next time because usually I never get round to it. I just think, Oh for God’s sake let’s hope that the majority know more about it than I do, and I’ll put my faith in that. I do think it’s important to have strong policies and confidence in your leaders. I watch Tony Blair on the TV and think he comes across as a bit of a prat really, the way he sounds and everything. And I mean, the local hospital is archaic. The staff are great but the bloody decor is crap.

When we had the floods, Blair came here and somebody shouted, “Don’t fall in ‘cos we’ve got no bloody hospitals!” And all he does when you look at his face is grin, y’know? Personally, I can’t bear to look at him.

I don’t trust politicians. I’m not saying they’ve got an easy job because they’ve got so many people to please. I don’t know what can be done about the NHS though. We’re spending too much money on the wrong things, like people coming into the country and us trying to house them. Fabio, my ex, is a chef and he works with a lot of Portuguese and Italians. They’re all living in hotels. It’s costing the government a fortune every week – stupid amounts of money.

I’m too lenient though, so I’d be terrible in government because you’re trying to help everyone and something’s got to give. When I was extremely staunch I was like, Get ‘em out, send them back to their own country. Because it’s not exactly helping the rest of us, is it? Having said that there’s probably a lot more wealth around now. But then I don’t see a lot of poverty. I’m quite well-off, personally.

I’d think politics was interesting – if my concentration span was long enough. It’s like a story, really, isn’t it? Like the Bible’s a story. It’s extremely complex and I don’t think I could begin to try and put it right.

I’m not stupid. I’m quite happy and I’m quite sensible as well. I’m OK at running a business the size of mine. I can’t really see myself opening a string of shops. Maybe one day when I get bored and I’ve got so many staff then I’ll have to. There’s another thing – finding the right staff. I’ve gone through juniors like the wind. It’s their attitude. They’re piss-takers. They come to work to earn a bit of money and then they go out, take drugs and get off their faces. They have no foresight about what this career might do for them, to make them independent. But I don’t have to employ them. I don’t need the heartache. And if I sell this shop I can still make money. People are always going to want their hair cut and styled, aren’t they?

The hypocritical life

I’m sensible, like my parents. They’ve got a good attitude. They don’t go to the pub and get pissed all the time. They’re hard-working and pleasant. They’ve probably pushed me a bit, worrying about what I might do, but when I worked it out, they were quite happy.

When I moved in here, I thought, I’m going to have a milkman deliver my milk and a paperboy deliver my paper. But it’d be a waste of money – at least as far as the paper’s concerned. So I don’t read the papers. I talk and listen to people. Usually my life is like – go to work, bit of shopping, home, cook food, speak to my mum. After that, I don’t have much time for anything else.

I’m quite liberal, because if clients come in with massive diamonds or ivory round their wrists, I think at first, That’s quite beautiful – but then I think, Flippin’ hell. So I’m not just after loads of money. I pay my staff well for what the business can afford, because I want them to be happy. I wasn’t an employer until I was thirty, so I know what it’s like.

But sometimes it seems to me that very wealthy people don’t really think too much. Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe they give loads of money to charity. Personally, I know that I’m a hypocrite. I do my bit but I could do more. Green issues concern me but I probably talk about it more than I live by it. It’s like when I see disturbing things on the TV. I think, I’m gonna ring that number. Then I realise, “Oh damn, I don’t have a pen.” I think it’s very difficult for people not to live a hypocritical life.

I never believe politicians. They only tell you what you want to hear. There’s so many other things that they’re not telling you. A politician’s like a salesman. He’s just there to sell his product. I don’t trust them.

It should be intelligent people in politics. The middle class. But then Blair comes from a middle-class background, doesn’t he? So maybe not. Anyway, I certainly couldn’t do it. I wouldn’t have time. I don’t even know whether this government is in favour of small businesses like mine. I think things’ll be OK for me. I don’t think about it, so I don’t stress about it.

I’d probably consult my dad if things turned bad. He gets involved and knows about the stock market. He was always Tory and said stuff like, “Get them out, all these people living off the state.” Then he had a stroke and he didn’t have a pension, even though he used to sell them. So he had to live on incapacity benefit. And he was always asking, “How much are they going to give me?” I thought, “Hang on, weren’t you always saying people shouldn’t live off the state?”

Nurturing and arse-kicking

People just think that all bosses are greedy gits. But I think they just want to argue. They want to fight the establishment. I suppose I am part of the establishment. I am helping myself, looking after myself. I don’t make any bones about it. If something jeopardises my business, I won’t do it, end of story. Because first of all comes me and my son, and what I’ve worked for.

Things have definitely changed since I was a junior. I got paid nothing and I worked God knows how many hours. So the government definitely look after people these days. It makes it very difficult for an employer to exploit the employee any more. That’s positive, but by the same token it gives people too much power.

My dad always talks about the lack of discipline now, like in schools. Before, you’d get a bloody clip round the ear or the cane, and no-one ever suffered as a consequence. Now, you can’t even say “boo” to them. And it’s true with juniors. If I’m nice to them, they think I’m a push-over, and they take the piss. Some people need nurturing, some need a kick up the arse.

I wouldn’t want my own son to be rude or misbehave. He’d have me to answer to if he did. I’ll probably bring him up the way my parents brought me up. When everything’s lovely, fine. But if he’s out of order, then I’ll tell him he’s bloody out of order. If he drives me mad, I’ll give him a clip or a slap. I’m not saying I feel good about it, but if he drives me mad then I trust the fact that he needs it.

My schooling was fine. I went to a state school. The problem was me. I never listened half the time, I was too busy talking. I wasn’t particularly interested. I just kind of ambled along. I put my trust in other people, and I’m alright.

I don’t know what goes on in Europe

If we are going to be European then we all have to operate the same way. I’ve got a client who has had abattoirs for years. It’s a nasty business but it’s got to be done. Of course, meat should be killed humanely. But they were coming across from Europe with loads of legislation, and it was costing him thousands of pounds. And he’s a businessman, so he does what they want but he doesn’t like it. And then he goes to Portugal and sees the slaughter of their meat. They just slit its neck and hang it up. Obviously they don’t have the same hygiene standards that they’re imposing on us.

It’s the same with bloody transport. My stepfather’s in haulage. And look at petrol prices! It’s one thing in Europe and another thing here. You go off to Greece and fill up your tank and it costs a fiver. These rules are not fair. The government wants to put everything on trains instead of lorries. But with the way the trains are run nowadays, we’ll all be dead. And it’ll be the same with my business. I’ll have to start learning about the euro and get a computer. At the moment, I don’t even know how to turn one on.

But I don’t know what goes on in Europe. I know that in Italy it’s probably extremely corrupt. It always has been and always will be. But in Britain, we swallow everything by the book and get fined and pay the fines and stress and worry and close the businesses down. Whereas in Italy, they do what they like. And if things go wrong, you get a bullet in your head. It’s all family orientated. Cousins doing each other favours, everyone looking after their own.

Many people don’t want us to go into Europe because we would lose our identity. But then you can’t always stay as you were. The world is changing – by using the internet you can see everywhere – so I think probably we should change with it.

It’s like the royals. I wouldn’t miss them if they went. I’m not a royalist. But I’ve got so many clients who come in saying they love the Queen, Prince Charles. People blindly think they’re good for us. But are they really? Do people really come here and spend a lot of money to see the Queen?

Roots of identity

I’m British but I’m also Jewish. I’m not religious, but I do feel Jewish and I quite like the fact that I’m not completely English. It’s more interesting. Again I don’t know too much about it. My grandmother was Jewish and was born and bred in Israel, but then she married my grandfather who was a British soldier, so she was ostracised. She didn’t practice the faith, and anyway they lived in Yorkshire. So you don’t know you’re any different until people say to you, “You’re funny, and your grandmother talks to you in a foreign accent.” Because you just accept it when you’re a child don’t you? I still do accept a lot of things.

I’ve been to Israel several times, but my family over there aren’t religious. There’s so much war and political angst there, with all the fighting over what Jesus said and what the Arabs say and where the oil wells lie. Jewish people have always been very respected. But I think they have probably been letting themselves down with all this bloodshed.

I’m proud to say that I am Jewish. I’ve never experienced any anti-Semitism. I think the Jewish people are strong people. I’m quite a strong person. It’s a genetic thing.

My son’s father is Italian. He’s a bloody political person. He’s such an argumentative git. We’ll be fighting and I’ll be talking about Jews, and he’ll say, “Yeah, but Hitler was only trying to look after his people, that’s what politicians do.” And I’m like, “What?” But he’s trying to teach me about these things. He’s not condoning what happened, he’s just talking about how politics probably starts and how it escalates.

Nothing should ever happen like that again. But then look at Yugoslavia. I probably feel quite safe here though. It wouldn’t happen here. The British are that kind of race. I think that genetically, people have certain characteristics. I think the Germans can be that kind of race. They’re very forceful, very single-minded. The British are much more easy going. We don’t complain.

Women can’t be bothered

It’s difficult not to be a feminist. Women aren’t housewives anymore. We’re out there in the world. We don’t scratch our balls, but I do swear like a man. I wouldn’t say that I’m a staunch feminist, but I wouldn’t say I’m a girlie-girl either. Women do care about remaining feminine though.

There aren’t many women in politics, are there? I know there’s one, because she used to get her hair done by my boss. I can’t remember what her name is, but she’s got very little hair at the front. Women can’t be bothered with all the crap. It’s probably a genetic thing. Like all the really successful hairdressers are men, because they’ve got more drive, more ambition. Women think a lot, but they just haven’t got the time to push themselves.

You can’t keep living in the past

Basically, I just want to have enough money so I can eat and go on holiday –y’know, keep my head above water? People say the best days were the poor days when everyone mucked in. I’d like to have a nicer house and all that. But I’d have to ask myself, What are you reaching for? Where are you going? People can get lonely and pissed off when they’ve got too much money. So you can end up by yourself and unhappy. But people who say the best years were the poor years only say that now because they’re not poor anymore.

It’s like with drugs. They’re reaching bloody epidemic proportions. I mean, I’ve done all that kind of stuff. And it was fun when I was doing it. It’s a mind opening experience. But it affects your work. It makes you more vocal and arrogant. It gives you a bad attitude. I think that cannabis is harmless, but then I never smoked it every single night or during the day. I’d just have a good laugh. But you don’t know what’s gonna happen if you legalise it. Maybe it’d be brilliant and everyone’d be much more chilled. Or maybe it’d have a knock-on effect and people would say, “Why not legalise a bit of cocaine?”

It’s the same with Europe. It sounds good. But maybe in the end it won’t be. We’ll just to cope with that situation when it arises. Because you can’t stop change. You can’t keep living in the past. I had a sculptor friend, and he did these androgynous figures and they had one foot on a skateboard and one half off, and when you talk to him he says it’s that fear – do they push off, or what? I think that’s where we’re at.