Douglas MacLeod (Edinburgh, writer): "Hang onto nurse for fear of something worse." Last May Jack Thamson's Bairns let go of nurse. Of course these Bairn's - a favourite metaphor Scots have for our preening egalitarian self image - weren't supposed to have a nurse, but they did, and she was called the Scottish Labour Party,It wasn't simply that Labour lost control of parliament. They paid the price for coalition with the Lib Dems. The introduction of proportional representation for local government shattered Labour's West of Scotland power base in their local government fiefdoms. But even that doesn't come close to the psychological impact. They had thought Scotland was theirs by right, forever and ever amen. It wasn't. The party went into a summer of denial before the former First Minister Jack McConnell finally resigned and Queen Wendy Alexander was finally crowned.
Some say she has a brain the size of a planet, others that it just seems that way because of the intellectual qualities of other Labour MSP's. Queen Wendy certainly has an original legal mind for the aspiring head of a legislature which may be her undoing. Having accepted campaign money illegally she has discovered the defence of intent: she did not intend to break the law, and therefore, she reasons, she is innocent. This wil be great news for those accused of murder in pub brawls. "I didnae intend tae kill him your honour", sure beats the hell out of "a big boy done it and ran away."
So to the big brain's big idea, the Scottish Constitutional Commission, a body drawn from the unionist parties which looks at how to extend Holyrood's power within the Union. It's designed to halt the Nationalist bandwagon. As such it's reminiscent of the Trots in the Labour Party in the 1980's who argued the electorate were voting for Mrs Thatcher because the Peoples Party wasn't left wing enough. Alex Salmond need to do nothing. Wendy's Commission will deliberate. It will come up with proposals. It will require a referendum. It would be unthinkable such a referendum would not include a question on independence, which would achieve the SNP's avowed aim of holding a referendum on -guess what?- independence without the Nats firing a shot.
Which begs the question, when is an independent country not an independent country? "Fiscal autonomy", giving Holyrood the power to raise and spend its own taxes is high on the Commissions agenda. If fiscal power is on the cards can monetary power be far behind? There's also talk about controlling immigration policy from Edinburgh. Already it's quacking like a duck and waddling like a duck.
Meantime, there are two elephants in the room. The West Lothian Question is a festering and unpleasant creature, fuelling English resentments. Again it's win win for Alex Salmond and his masterly schmoozing of English public opinion into seeing Scottish Independence, and consequently English Independence, as a perfectly reasonable mutually agreeable goal: eliminating the West Lothian Question and unseemly arguments about money. His Westminster years were not wasted years, and he can play middle England like an old guitar.
The other elephant in the room is turnout. Whisper it softly in the corridors of Holyrood, but just a whisker over half of the electorate bothered to vote at the last Scottish Elections. Are the silent forty nine per cent just apathetic, or are they sending out a message of hostility to Holyrood? To many Scots, the denizens of Holyrood, from Ministers and MSP's to the journos and the largely self appointed phalanxes of campaigners and lobbyists surrounding the place, are nothing more or less than a bunch of self important windbags and busybodies. But one day they may wake up in a Scotland independent by default. Ach well, we can always revert to our auld sang and blame the English for forcing independence on us and deserting Scotland in the hour of its need. Jocks need the odd whinge.
